Worst Photoshopped Movie Posters Ever - Oddetorium

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Sunday 16 June 2013

Worst Photoshopped Movie Posters Ever

Worst Photoshopped Movie Posters Ever

"The Heat"
This week the film world erupted in scorn over what was one of the most brazen Photoshop jobs ever seen. The poster for the upcoming action comedy "The Heat" featured an image of actress Melissa McCarthy that was so heavily touched up, she was almost unrecognizable.



WHO NEEDS BONES: LIQUIFIED BODIES
"Jonah Hex"
Megan Fox must have trouble breathing because she has no ribcage, or at least it looks that way in this scarily 'shopped poster. And Josh Brolin came to the gunfight with some of the tiniest shrunken arms ever seen.


WHO NEEDS BONES: LIQUIFIED BODIES
"GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra"
One of the film’s taglines is "Evil never looked so good," which is true until you realize that, in the case of Sienna Miller, evil also means that your face will be squished and in order to feature your leather-encased backside front and center, you will have to twist your shoulders around nearly 180 degrees if you also want that squished face to be seen.



WHO NEEDS BONES: LIQUIFIED BODIES
"The Whole Ten Yards"
Where to start… Bruce Willis appears to have been shot with a tranquilizer that makes his face droop, he has the daintiest legs ever (and we're not talking about the slippers), and Kevin Pollack is secretly half-giraffe. This is just the beginning of what makes this poster look so wrong.


WHO NEEDS BONES: LIQUIFIED BODIES
"King Arthur"
Keira Knightley’s never been known for her, err, womanly assets, but no worries! That can all be taken care of with a little click and drag, giving Knightley some significant oomph on her upper body. (Also: Clive Owen's neck appears to have invaded his face.)


FEE FI FO FUM: LAND OF THE GIANT-LIMBED
"Hall Pass"
Sure, sure, all three guys were shot from different angles and sloppily pasted into some sort of lineup, but what's really terrifying about this poster is Owen Wilson's upper body. One arm belongs to a boy — while bursting out of the frame towards us is the hand of a colossus.


FEE FI FO FUM: LAND OF THE GIANT-LIMBED
"Bangkok Dangerous"
Nicolas Cage's face actually looks pretty great (albeit eerily smooth and 30 years younger than his actual age), but what on earth is happening to his arms? His left hand is reaching into — not under, but INTO — his right arm, and his right arm is a disjointed, massive mess, emerging from an elbow, which at these proportions would be approximately 18 miles beyond the edge of the photo.


FEE FI FO FUM: LAND OF THE GIANT-LIMBED
"Wanted"
To be fair, this poster's setup is tricky (Angelina Jolie is crouching out of the frame), but that still doesn't explain her scarily spindly arm. She shouldn't be able to support anything with those wrists, let alone that huge hand and 10 pounds of steel-shooting power.


FEE FI FO FUM: LAND OF THE GIANT-LIMBED
"Everybody's Fine"
Sure, everybody looks fine at first glance, until you realize there's a shadowy, disembodied hand taking a meta-portrait inside the poster. Oh wait, that's just Robert De Niro's magically detachable arm taking an impossible selfie pic.


MAGIC ERASER: FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH
"Little Fockers"
De Niro and Ben Stiller might be watching you, but clearly no one's watching over Stiller's poster appearance. His skin has been airbrushed to oblivion, giving him the complexion and sheen of a Ken doll.


MAGIC ERASER: FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH
"Sex and the City 2"
Carrie Bradshaw was known for keeping it real in her column, but the stars of "SATC 2" look anything but. Everybody's faces look as smooth as the silks they're clad in. Kim Cattrall's nose has been practically made invisible, Kristin Davis's neck is about to snap, and Sarah Jessica Parker's already long face has had another foot added to its length. Together they look like an alien race just landed in the desert about to begin devouring any puny humans they find. Terrifying


MAGIC ERASER: FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH
"Trespass"
Even ignoring Nic Cage’s "I"m going to kill you" expression, Nicole Kidman's face has been so stretched, smoothed, and pulled that she looks like a Japanese anime character. Those are some Lady Gaga-in-"Bad Romance" eyes.


COPY, PASTE: CREEPY COMPOSITES
"The King’s Speech"
Colin Firth, Helena Bonham Carter, and Geoffrey Rush don't seem to realize they've been cast in the same poster and their eyes gaze off in opposite directions, toward the scenes from whence they were grabbed.


COPY, PASTE: CREEPY COMPOSITES
"Heartbreakers"
Ohhhh man. First off, the movie's title is stylized like a tween girl's IM username. Second, Gene Hackman looks like he's popping by from the movie poster next door. Third, clearly that is not Sigourney Weaver's face. But is it her body?


COPY, PASTE: CREEPY COMPOSITES
"Joyful Noise"
All four stars look like they're coming from different concerts with entirely different lighting setups. Beyond that, the crowd behind them features creepily discernible faces gazing in awe off somewhere above the women on stage, while the fans in front of them look less like jubilant admirers and more like zombies pawing at a glass wall.


COPY, PASTE: CREEPY COMPOSITES
"The Bounty Hunter"
Unless Gerard Butler has the leg-to-body proportions of a supermodel, and Jennifer Aniston has a bosom made out of rock, this poster makes absolutely no sense. What is Butler sitting on? A tiny little bench that Aniston plopped down next to?


COPY, PASTE: CREEPY COMPOSITES
"What to Expect When You’re Expecting"
Pregnancy has never looked less human. Elizabeth Banks might be the only person in the actual photo. All the other ladies look about as real as the fake bellies they're sporting — except J.Lo, who just looks lost. Also, that tagline.


COPY, PASTE: CREEPY COMPOSITES
"The Expendables/The Expendables 2"
We can see what Stallone and Co. were shooting for with the posters for both "The Expendables" and its sequel, but these fellows look less like comrades in arms and more like airbrushed stars from different franchises dropped into sloppily-assembled, depthless layers. 


DOLL FACES: SNAP-ON HEADS
"Blonde and Blonder"
The complete hack job of this build-your-own-Barbies poster would almost be forgivable if it weren’t for the fact that Pamela Anderson and Denise Richards are Frankenstein assemblages of bronze skin and pink accessories.


DOLL FACES: SNAP-ON HEADS
"December Boys"
Potter, don't just stand there looking into the distance with your abnormally smooth chest gleaming in the sunlight! There's a she-creature with a giant, disjointed head right behind you!
 
 
 
DOLL FACES: SNAP-ON HEADS
"Nothing to Lose"
Now, Tim Robbins is a tall dude (6'4.75" to be exact), but that's no excuse for how Lawrence looks. Is it possible they just took the body of a child and stretched it out, then pasted his incredulous face on top? Disturbing — because it could actually be true.


WHAT IS HAPPENING: MANGLED MORPHS
"Percy Jackson & the Lightning Thief"
If there were any woman who could rock a killer serpentine mane, it'd be Uma Thurman. Hello! She was literally Black Mamba in "Kill Bill!" Sadly, this barely-pasted-on-excuse-for Medusa hair is — contrary to the poster tagline — neither dangerous nor beautiful. It just looks like some Mount Olympus hairstylist had one cup of Ambrosia too many before getting Medusa in the chair. 




WHAT IS HAPPENING: MANGLED MORPHS

"Good Luck Chuck"
CANNOT UNSEE. Okay, so they're trying to pull a Lennon/Ono reference, which would be neat if it weren't for the film's own concept and the fact that Cook looks like an uncanny valley creation. At least Alba's head is so clearly pasted in from some other scene, we can have some relief in knowing she didn't have to endure this photo shoot.
 


WHAT IS HAPPENING: MANGLED MORPHS
"X-Men: First Class"
There are no words. Okay, there are some: What the hell were they thinking when they decided that the best way to showcase the new "X-Men" reboot was by fuzzily superimposing McAvoy’s and Fassbender’s faces over their blacked out crotches?


HONORABLE MENTION: THIS ISN’T SUSPECT AT ALL
"Couples Retreat"
There are actually good reasons to change a poster for its international publicity campaign, but one can only wonder what the rationale was behind airbrushing the only POC cast members out of the film poster and removing their names from the cast list.

Source: Yahoo

 

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